How to crash a motorcycle

‘They say I have broken every bone in my body. Not true.’ Words from the Guinness World Record holder for most bones broken in a lifetime, Evel Knievel. As his glorious tally of 433 independent fractures would indicate, he was certainly a man who knew how to crash a motorcycle.

But this isn’t a story about how to soar high over 13 London buses at almost 100mph, because after all, ‘anyone can jump a motorcycle, the trouble comes when you try to land it’. Rather we will journey into all the wonderful ways you can crash without your bike ever leaving the ground. With both wheels, anyway.

Crashing has to be a natural concern when your chosen mode of transport couldn’t be keener to fall over all by itself. You will not find a single (honest) biker who hasn’t dropped their bike at some point. There’s usually a good excuse (diesel on filling station forecourts, sidestand failures and soft ground being the favourites), and despite the inevitable emotional turmoil of ruining your pride and joy, there really is no shame in it. Unless anyone sees you, in which case it’s worse than calling your teacher ‘Mummy’ in front of the whole class.